How I 'see' music

*EDIT: scrapped.

Cluttered my gallery too much.

Welp, this is one of the most interesting color studies I've ever done.

Since a few months but possibly longer, I seem to associate some songs with certain colors. I first noticed when I saw that the colors I associated with a certain song were reflected in the artwork I made while listening to it. Mostly it's one color which predominates all the others, and that one is always the easiest to pinpoint right away. Such as "Russian blue" for the song "I'm Jim Morrison, I'm dead" by Mogwai, or "hot pink" for the song Red by Angelspit, or "purple" for the piano piece by Schubert.
I picked a few varying songs so the difference is very clear.

On a side note, I'm aware of the existense of synesthesia, however, I'm pretty certain this isn't the case. I assume I'm just imagining things mostly on purpose somehow, though I can't explain why giving a certain song a different color than the one I think it has makes my hair stand on end because it would be "wrong". I haven't even had this color association thing for very long anyhow, or at least I didn't particularly notice it before.
Anyway, I'll try to explain how it works for me at the risk of sounding like I completely lost it, and I can't guarantee it'll make much sense.


Each song has its own color pattern, and when I try to "imagine" a color which I didn't initially "see" while listening to it, I feel physically nauseous because it doesn't "belong" there. They also all behave in different patterns depending on the song, and the patterns never change. I also don't "see" them in my direct field of vision or floating in front of me, but rather clear as day in my head.
If it gets overwhelming, I get headaches too. Like yesterday. And right now, since I'm still listening to one of the songs I listed below which makes it really difficult to focus.
The shapes are also not complex. I don't see a blue unicorn run around for example, unless I'm actually daydreaming which is something else. They're mostly swirls, dots, angular shapes and lines.

I also don't have it with all sounds and/or songs, just a particular few up until here. With some songs I don't really associate anything at all, or not as clearly as with others. Songs with piano and "lower/heavier" sounds tend to be the easiest to see. A lot of industrial songs with high-pitched sounds have some weird "white hot" colors going which is painful.
Some patterns are also the same, such as piano keys which I imagine as colorful dots. They tend to vary in size and color depending on how high/low the tones are.

I'm not always bothered by imagining these colors either, which is why I'm convinced it's more a result of stress/anxiety combined with an overactive imagination rather than something like synesthesia. It mostly happens when I'm under tremendous pressure and when I have more trouble with "blocking out" certain thoughts, which is also when I first noticed a song "sounded" like a particular color.

I take it everyone can imagine things like these and associate sounds with colors/patterns, and I'm no different. I was just wondering whether the colors/patterns also remain the same at all times with other people, and whether they're always clear or whether you need some time to imagine them, which in the songs I mentioned for example I do not. That song by Mogwai has always instantly been Russian blue, and it will remain that way.
And if so, what songs do others associate with which colors/patterns?


The four songs pictured are these:

Low Roar - Tonight, tonight, tonight
Mogwai - I'm Jim Morrison, I'm dead
Angelspit - Red
Schubert - Drei klavierstücke (D946)


The colors aren't entirely right in the pictures though. the song "Red" had more hot pink, but I don't have that color and had to use regular pink which isn't as bright. The white was also far brighter. The lime green and yellow in the song by Mogwai was also easier to see, and the orange and blue are both darker. The song by Low roar also has more waves and ultramarine blue closer to the end, but it generally looks layered like in the picture. The black of Drei klavierstücke was also pitch black for the most part, and the dark green was more prominent.

For another example, the picture "Lost" in my gallery was made while listening to "Yankee bayonet" by The decemberists. I associate that song with a flurry of colors for some reason where no one color in particular stands out.


regular markers, a few copic markers, Derwent colorsoft pencils, watercolor and some white acrylic on paper.